... As I Sit Back .... Drinking ... A Black Cherry Sparkling H2o ... While Eating A Bagel ... Listening To What Goes Around By Justin Timberlake ... I Find My Self In One Of My Thinking Modes Again ... I Look At The Clock And Its 3:30am ... And People Ask Me Why Im Always Up So Late ... Its Because I Don't Like To Sleep ... I Feel Like When Im Sleep I Be Missing Out On Something Or Im Up Waiting For Change In My Life ... And The Only Thing That Come To Me While Im Sleep Is A False Reality That I Sometimes Wish I Was Living ... So I'll Rather Stay Up Living A Reality That I Know Not False To Me ... Plus Lately Stuff That I've Dreamed About Beens Coming True ... Like Little Stuff Nothing Big Yet But I Think They Call It A Premonition Or Something ... And I've Been Having Dreams Of Me Dying ... And To Help Avoid Those Dream To Come True ... I'll Rather Not Sleep ... Call Me Crazy If You Want ... But It All Makes Since To Me ... And Thats What Really Matter ... ha ... The Other Day ... This Girl ... Told Me That Im Special ... Not Like "Special" ... But Special Like Different From Everybody Else She Ever Meet ... And When I Asked Her How So ... She Said She Couldn't Explain It ... It's Like I Think Differently From Everybody Else ... Its Like Im Mysterious ... In Some Way That Its More To Me Then What I Show Everybody ... And That I Have A Story To Tell ... And I Laughed And Said First Off Your Crazy And Second Off Don't Everybody Got A Story To Tell ... Its Just Up To Them If They Tell It Or Not ... And She Said Right ... So Are You Going To Tell Yours ... And I Said Yeah Once I Know The End Of It ... Because I Don't Like Starting Stuff I Can't Really Finish ... And Unfortunately Once I Know The End Of My Story ... I Won't Be Able To Write The Story ... And Why Would People Wanna Know My Story Anyway ... She Said Because It'll Help Them Understand You ... And I Laughed Again ... Thats The Thing ... I Don't Wanna Be Understood ... It'll Just Make Things More Difficult ... She Asked Me What's My Biggest Fear ... And I Once Again I Laughed And Said If I Tell You That I'll Have To Kill You Because Then You'll Know My Weakness ... But I'll Tell You That I Fear Of Ending Up How Everybody Say I Am ... Which Is Nothing ... A Failure And Never Would Amount To Nothing In Life ... And As Of Right Now ... They Sound About Right ... And I Don't Really Like The Idea Of People Predicting How Im A End Up In Life ... And Trying To Knock Me ... Even If Im Not Doing Anything With My Life At The Moment ... I Think They Should Try To Motivate Me To Try To Do Something ... And Stop Stating The Obvious ... I Know Im Not Perfect I Know I Didn't Do Right In School ... I Know I Didn't Do What I Was Supposed To Alot Of The Times ... But Im Young And Im Human ... So Wants Again Stop Stating The Obvious ... Because I Know What I Did An Thats Not Helping My Case Or Situation At All ... I Don't Need You Putting The Shit Back In My Face ... But You Know Sometimes You Gotta Do Stuff You Don't Want To ... To Get Where You Want To In Life ... If Thats The Case ... Then So Be It ... I Guess Thats What Imma Have To Do .... So Imma A End This Here ... Because I Have To Sleep ... I'll Finish This Some Other Time .... Roman Numeral Uno ... =]
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